Download e-book for iPad: Ames' Guide to Self-Instruction in Practical and Artistic by Daniel T. Ames

By Daniel T. Ames

Ames' consultant to Self-Instruction in functional and creative Penmanship, Daniel T. Ames, writer and writer, 1884

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Sample text

For a while, the pain is acute. Yet over time, the mind focuses less and less on what has been lost. This mental shift of focus away from loss allows positive experiences with the deceased—restorative images—to dominate memory. It becomes pleasant to think about the lost loved one. At that point, emotional healing has occurred. I was quite aware of these facts about recovery from grief after more than a decade of research and clinical observations. But my intellectual understanding held no emotional significance beyond empathy for others—until my mother died.

Desensitization may well take more repetitions when the painful memories are virulent, but your emotional healing and ultimate well-being are worth the effort. My client Madeline is an excellent example of the way many people have used desensitization to aid the reconditioning process. Madeline had been divorced from an unfaithful, verbally abusive, and financially domineering man for years when she came to see me. Though only forty-one years old, she had neither desired nor attempted a serious relationship since her divorce.

Part II of the book will offer general tools to construct the most beneficial meaning of your experience, to help regulate painful emotions. Return to this exercise once you finish the book, and you should find it much easier to answer the last question. Effort to Improve Negative emotions hurt until we start on the path of healing and improving. For example, if you feel a sense of loss, that feeling will tend to worsen, until you begin to think of what you can do to deepen connections with other people in your life.

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Ames' Guide to Self-Instruction in Practical and Artistic Penmanship by Daniel T. Ames


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